Wednesday, January 26, 2011


I've been sort of hit with a wave of discouragement lately and I can't seem to shake it.

Discouragement is a nasty thing.  
It seriously just seeps into your life in such subtle ways, until all of a sudden (at least for me) it blows up into feelings of anger, depression, and just outright discouragement (duh, I know).

As some of you know, we've had our house on the market for a little over 5 months now.  Trying to sell this bad boy since September.  
Beautiful right?  Wannabuyit?
 At the start of this journey, there was nothing but sheer excitement.

We had found an opportunity to build our (right now) dream home for cheaper than the beautiful home that we were already living in.  With me trading in my fulltime paying job for a fulltime mommy job (that pays in diapers, spit-up stained shirts, and smiles) we thought it was the perfect thing.  Thank you God.

Well, we never anticipated it would take this long to sell our house.

Not to complain, but it is quite the hassle to play Fireman Fred when you get the call (that you desperately want) in the morning saying showing in 30 minutes, and your house looks like it's been hit by 40 dumptrucks and a Hurricane Katrina.   
This is Fireman Fred.  Duh.
AHHHHH.  Anyone who has ever had their house on the market, with little kids at home, can relate to this I'm sure of it.

It stresses me out.  It's usually during Brecken's naptime (why wouldn't it be?), or when it's my turn to host the playdates, or the day after we've hosted a big dinner party or family gathering

I think I've come to learn though that these are the moments that God is refining me.  Despite the discouragement, fire drills and constant yo-yo feeling of doyoulovemyhouseenoughtomakeusanoffer, I think ultimately God is wanting me to just trust.

The good news is that really, it doesn't matter if our house sells.  And that (right now) dream home, can wait.  For another day.  Or another family who needs it more.  Or loves it more.

But sometimes, I catch myself daydreaming about a new house.  A clean slate.  New furniture.  The perfect shades of grey everywhere.
Source Unknown
Thom Filica Striped Room
Crap, can't remember where I got this picture either.

It's pretty much already decorated in my head.

But not knowing leaves me in this state of limbo.  And I hate limbo.  I am a girl who craves security.

I was never promised security though.  Ugh.

I was just told to trust.

So I thought I would confess my discouragement to you today so that it can't keep me captive, or discouraged, one minute longer.
Total side note:
Watching Ellen today, was so excited to see she received the best gift ever - a well in her name via Charity:Water.  I, now with our friends and family, now have something in common with Ellen - clean water for others!


  1. Unfortunately, I can relate to this as well. I do know, however, that God has plans that we can't understand and this is just a season to get through. ~Crista

  2. Hi Ashley-

    I can relate to living in limbo as well. I have been living in limbo for 2 years now. My hubby lost his job and has been searching non stop for a new one. Things are looking up and we can relocate if needed. Just not knowing where I am going to be etc etc has taken its toll on my stress level. I just know it is only temporary, but I want to feel grouned again. As far a your house selling - it will eventually. The market is still rebounding and hopefully as the economy comes back so will buyers.
    Try to just enjoy every day for what it is and before you know it you will be looking back on this time and saying to yourself - oh that wasn't too bad.
    My best- Diane


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